Thursday, 1 October 2015

The Journey to the center of Me - Part 3

I am fully aware that I might be writing the current posts more for myself than for anyone else, but such is the nature of a diary, isn't it? If you are reading this, I am glad you are joining me for Day 3 on my healing journey (Day 1 and 2 are in the previous posts), a journey that is assisted by the book "Seven Days in UTOPIA, Golf's Sacred Journey" written by David L. Cook, PhD. In the first two days I learnt about finding answers in the right places and the importance of quiet times. I also shared with you that I finally figured out that it is never about what we achieve as a mom but how we achieve it. The next chapter in the book is titled "Signing a Masterpiece".

Please have a look at this picture for a moment...what do you see?


Image courtesy of www.morguefile.com
Do you just see a beautiful landscape or do you see that it is a golf course? And if you see the golf course...do you see the target or do you just see the obstacles, the trees?  The target, by the way is a tiny little flag at the end of the grass strip and sometimes it is very hard to spot! I definitely used to focus on the obstacles of my life, but with the help of this book I finally started to change that.

On "Day 3" in Utopia the golfer learns that in order to be a great player, he must become an artist. He learns that great golf shots start, similar to painting, with a blank canvas and that he must paint the shot with his eyes first, before his body can produce it. He must learn to "see the shot", "feel the shot" and then trust that he will make the right shot from that memory. Golf is a game played to a memory of what you pictured earlier. A golfer usually only glances at the hole, then he looks down and staring at the ball, he swings. He is attempting to move the ball according to the picture that has previously been imprinted in his mind. So it's kind of obvious that the "painting" in his mind is paramount to whether or not his shot will succeed. Our golfer also learns that trees, bunkers and water are not his enemies nor are any other object on the course. Golf players often look upon such objects with fear or disdain and allow them to steal their energy and focus, but they are actually just a part of the course, a part of their perspective and they can be guides that lead them to the target. One particular tree dominates our golfer's landscape and from where he stands, it demands most of his attention because of its imposing size. He realizes, that it takes effort to see beyond it and concludes that this might be why sometimes it is so difficult in golf to even "see" the shot - because the immediate environment very often simply commands attention. The right perspective becomes a key component to his progress now. The farmer teaches him that in order to be an artist and a great golfer, he has to let go of "perfect". This is new, something he has never done before and for some time he struggles. A voice within, somewhat pessimistically keeps reciting all his inabilities and failures to him. But he persists and on "Day 3", assisted by the farmer, he manages to step back into his childhood and finds himself at play, with art as a new companion. It feels right and he finally learns to...see, feel and trust.

My summary of this chapter is of course very abbreviated, but it has lead me to some conclusions of great importance to myself. I believe that we all loved to be artists when we were little, but I wonder how many of us still see themselves as artists now? More importantly it has lead me to ask: Do I have to be an artist to be a good mother and am I creative? Every day in life starts with a "blank canvas", a new morning, and when I used to delve into my days randomly, when I lived them before I even painted them, they hardly ever turned out very well! But, when I started to take quiet times in the mornings, it was as if I was finally taking the time to "see" and "feel" what I wanted my days to be like and that's when things really began to change. I had never learnt to "paint a day with my eye" before. I always just tried to "survive" or "get through" my days. I often traveled from bunker to bunker and have let them steal my energy and focus!! It has never occurred to me to take the time and make a mental picture of the kind of day I wanted to have or of the kind of mother I wanted to be. But I have learnt that "painting my day" during an early morning quiet time has become paramount to my day being successful. I have learnt to paint and play according to what I have painted and it has made such a change!

Image courtesy of www.morguefile.com
Oh, and one more thing! One particular tree dominated the golfer's landscape and demanded most of his attention...remember? I have also encountered such a tree on my journey, but of course it wasn't a real tree, it was my mother. Perhaps some of you can relate? Do you have someone in your life that sometimes commands your attention, a little more than you would like them to? For me, it always took great effort to see beyond my mother, but I realize now that, though I sometimes might have perceived her as my enemy, she never really was. She was and is just a part of my story, part of my perspective on life and she, as well as all other challenges in my life, have just guided me to my target and my target is God. But in order to reach my target I too had to  first find the child within! I had to let go of "perfect" and just like the golfer I had to overcome a pessimistic and critical voice that can still be rather discouraging at times. I have started the journey to the "center of Me" and though my journey is not yet complete, I am much more "at play" now and art is becoming my constant companion, even though it might be my kind of art. My creativity seems to express itself in less "conventional" ways, though I certainly do enjoy a good time of baking. But I also enjoy creating an Instagram or a blog post and through it all I am starting to understand the art of letting go. All of life is starting to feel right when I just let go and "be me", when I see the truth, feel His love and trust that He will always be there with me and all of that starts flowing in my quiet times...

So, Day 3 has come to an end and I look forward to Day 4! I hope you will visit again in a couple of weeks when my 7-day journey continues...

HAVE A GREAT WEEK!


 

4 comments:

  1. Thanks for a challenging post Sue. I'm going to imagine my day today and see how it works.

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    1. Only a pleasure! Let me know how you do. ;) It has worked great for me only recently during a trip through Europe...

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  2. Super thought provoking post, Sue, thank you. I think this would also work for our writing if we make mental pictures of novels etc before starting to write.

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    1. You are so right! Try it out! I am sure it would help with writing too. As a matter of fact I really think it helps with absolutely everything, even a holiday trip. I have practiced in the last two weeks and asked myself every morning...what kind of day do I want to have and it was an absolutely fabulous trip! :)

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